Mary couldn’t fall asleep for a long time. Tonight, the familiar bunk felt especially uncomfortable and rigid. The barracks were stifling, filled with a repulsive smell—something thick and suffocating. She had never encountered such a stench in the free world. She desperately wanted to stand under a hot shower, scrubbing her skin raw with a soapy sponge to wash away the events of the past few years…
Against her will, Mary began slipping into memories again… Doing so was agonizing… and in her current circumstances, even dangerous. Before her eyes, several newly arrived inmates had crumbled under the harsh reality of prison life… They didn’t survive, broken and exhausted… Each had her own story, but one thing united them—excessive sensitivity and weakness. And it wasn’t true that the helpless were spared. This place had its own laws. So, Mary decided she had a reason to live and wouldn’t let herself fall apart.
Mentally, Mary imagined two people living inside her. One—the old, authentic self. The other—the current one, with nerves of steel and a thick armor. It made things easier… And life, indeed, became easier…
But tonight, everything followed a different script… Vivid images from her past swirled in her head like a carousel… The reason was a letter from her neighbor, Aunt Victoria. She wrote about recent events. Mary’s beloved grandmother, who had raised her from infancy, had taken to her bed… Her health had deteriorated sharply after what happened to her cherished granddaughter. Still, she held on as long as she could… She regularly sent packages with hand-knitted clothes and even visited Mary a couple of times… But her aging body, it seemed, was slowly destroying itself… And was there any justice in this world?
Her grandmother had poured her entire soul into raising Mary. She protected her as best she could… But she couldn’t stop her from rushing into a hasty marriage… That was her fatal mistake… She saw through Mary’s young husband, Paul, from the start. But she didn’t dare oppose her granddaughter’s decision… He pretended to be in love, but every gesture carried a hint of falseness, cowardice, and malice… Her worst fears came true…
Her young husband took out loans to start a shady business, registering it in Mary’s name… A year and a half after the wedding, Mary found herself in a penal settlement… For her husband’s deeds… Meanwhile, claiming he was still too young, he secretly filed for divorce… And, without shame, brought his girlfriends to the very apartment Mary had so carefully furnished…
Mary squeezed her eyes shut, trying not to recall her grandmother’s desperate attempt to save her. The old woman found an ad in the newspaper for a lawyer promising a guaranteed court victory… She gathered all her savings, went into debt, believing in what seemed like a competent professional. But he couldn’t do anything… Perhaps he lacked the expertise, or going up against Paul’s wealthy family was beyond his reach…
The judge overseeing the case likely realized the defendant was merely a victim of circumstance… But he couldn’t go against the evidence—or the system. So, to soften Mary’s fate as much as possible, he gave her the minimum sentence—four and a half years. And sent her not to a high-security prison, but to a penal settlement…
More than anything, Mary dreamed of walking free… And doing everything to help her dearest person forget this nightmare… She pictured the two of them going to a spa, swimming in a pool, and eating ice cream… She would find a job… And buy her grandmother a new coat, dresses, and a hat… Her grandmother had seen so little joy in life… One of her sons (Mary’s father) died in a car accident along with his wife. The other remained a bachelor, ruined by his addiction to alcohol… At least he lived separately, in a nearby dormitory.
The first rays of sunlight began to fill the barracks… With dawn, Mary’s chaotic thoughts finally took on clear shapes—she had to escape. Even at the cost of her life. As a granddaughter, she needed to say goodbye to her grandmother. Otherwise, she would never forgive herself.
Today was John’s shift. To Mary, he seemed the only guard who treated the inmates not as mere “meat” but as people, albeit fallen ones. She never heard crude jokes or suggestive remarks from him. Yet, sometimes, she caught his lingering gazes and a strange, enigmatic smile…
Mary knew the daily schedule by heart. So, when John was alone, she seized the chance to speak with him privately.
— John! I’m sorry for approaching you like this… But I think you, of all people, might understand… My grandmother is dying… She’s the only family I have, aside from a drunken uncle… I desperately want to say goodbye to her… Could you let me go for a few hours? In return, I promise to do whatever you ask… I won’t run. I’ll return exactly when you tell me. I just want to hug her one last time… — Mary said, her voice trembling, her eyes pleading.
Clearly, he hadn’t expected this… At first, his eyes showed unmasked surprise, then a sinister glint appeared… A laugh followed… After a brief pause, John spoke:
— So, you’re asking me to break protocol? Risk not just my job, but my own freedom? Do you realize what I’d face for that?…
Mary lowered her gaze. Her back hunched, as if a heavy weight had settled on her shoulders… Against her will, tears streamed from her eyes…
She hadn’t wanted to show weakness… For so long, she’d managed to control her emotions… But everything has its limit…
— I’ll come back… I’ll work in the yard during the day… I’ll be at roll call… And I’ll return in the morning… Before the check… No one will notice… — she whispered, barely audible, as if forcing out each word.
John knew inmates could manipulate guards psychologically, playing the “poor lamb” card… In reality, every woman here had more skeletons in her closet than the average man…
They were trained never to engage in personal conversations with prisoners… There was no such thing as “women” here. No special treatment. A criminal was a criminal.
Yet, he decided to exploit the situation. This inmate was different from the others. As if she truly hadn’t committed a crime and ended up here by mistake. He’d been watching her for a long time. After a moment’s thought, John said:
— Alright. I’ll consider your request… But only if you agree to spend the night with me… Deals like this don’t happen on a whim… For me, it’s a huge risk. I could get into more trouble than your dying grandmother…
Mary could barely stand… She realized John was no ally… She felt disgusted with herself and her mistake in trusting him… His base instincts and position meant more to him than simple human decency…
But she couldn’t back out now… After voicing her request, she’d draw even more attention. Refusing meant conflict. And unwanted attention was the last thing she needed. So, Mary nodded and said:
— Fine… I agree…
In truth, Mary had already decided—if she couldn’t negotiate fairly, she would see her grandmother by escaping. She just needed to wait for the right moment.
The day dragged on endlessly. Mary pretended everything was as usual. Under the guards’ watchful eyes, she worked diligently. But in her heart, she imagined burying her face in her grandmother’s hair, kissing and hugging her. God, how she missed her!…
The evening roll call passed as usual. The time for Mary and John’s “meeting” was approaching. The thought alone made her shudder.
Waiting until the guards were out of sight and no curious inmates were around, Mary slipped outside. It was surprisingly easy. A construction project was underway on the colony’s grounds. She had long noticed a gap under the concrete fence, which the workers were reinforcing, large enough for her to squeeze through. For a slim, agile young woman, it was no trouble.
For a moment, Mary glanced back and then ran toward the forest with all her might. The path home lay through dense woods. It would take at least two or three hours.
Branches whipped her face. Her head spun. Her legs felt stiff, like wood. Mary tried to bolster herself with thoughts of her grandmother. She pushed away the fear that her escape would be discovered… After all, the colony’s administration knew her grandmother’s address… They could easily show up there… She didn’t want to think about what that might mean for her frail grandmother…
Meanwhile, John was in high spirits. He’d never had affairs with inmates, unlike some of his senior colleagues… Though some prisoners, craving male attention, made him suggestive offers… Others openly wanted to get pregnant, as it could lead to early release. It was horrifying to think how many such reckless mothers there were in the country, when even in their colony, over ten women were currently pregnant. And John knew none of their partners or husbands visited…
Mary would be his first. Slightly wild and distant… But all the more desirable… With these thoughts, he entered the barracks to fetch her. But her bunk was empty. Or rather, under the blanket was a pile of rags, arranged to mimic a sleeping person…
Cold sweat beaded on John’s forehead. If the administration learned of this incident, he’d face more than a reprimand—at best, he’d be fired; at worst… He trembled and rushed out. Quickly flipping through her file to find her relatives’ address, where she might have gone, he sounded the alarm and set off in pursuit.
The dogs quickly picked up her trail. But in the forest, they lost it. The colony staff split up. John was furious with Mary. His pride was wounded. He wanted to be the one to catch her. He followed her trail like a wolf.
Finally, he saw he was on the right path. The tall grass was unnaturally trampled. He quickened his pace. He couldn’t let the fugitive outsmart him again.
At last, he spotted a moving figure in the distance. Minutes later, he reached her. John grabbed Mary by the hair and threw her to the ground. She fought back desperately, biting him, but he, as if crazed, began tearing off her clothes… The last thing she remembered before losing consciousness was his enraged, animal-like glare and his words:
— This isn’t what we agreed on!
The ordeal lasted minutes, but to Mary, it felt like an eternity. Nausea overwhelmed her. She couldn’t break free from his iron grip… Finally, her hand found a rock, and with her remaining strength, she struck him on the head. A long groan followed. He collapsed, unconscious.
Hastily dressing, Mary stood and ran again. After what happened, she lost her bearings. But she couldn’t stop…
When the first rays of sunlight touched the ground, Mary saw she was at the forest’s edge. But ahead wasn’t a village—it was a cemetery… This didn’t frighten her… She recalled her grandmother’s oft-repeated words: “Don’t fear the dead—fear the living.” Now, Mary knew this was true…
She wandered slowly among the graves, as if in a daze… Faces of all ages stared at her from the headstones. Some smiled… Could they have known these would be their final photos, chosen by grieving relatives from family albums? For a moment, she wondered if this awaited her too… The thought that the authorities might already be searching her grandmother’s home stabbed her heart… Even in death, I couldn’t let her rest in peace… Always causing trouble…
Suddenly, near a fresh grave, Mary saw a hunched figure. For a moment, she froze in fear. But curiosity overcame her. Approaching, she saw an elderly man leaning on a cane. His head was bowed. He was clearly grieving. The photo on the headstone showed a young woman. Her gaze was kind but weary… Though, as it turned out, she was only three years older than Mary…
The old man finally sensed he wasn’t alone and turned slowly… Seeing a stranger in tattered clothes, her face bruised and bloodied, he gasped in shock and fear…
Mary didn’t want to scare the elderly man, so she stepped back, intending to move on… But the old man, with surprising agility for his age, stood and approached her.
— Dear girl! What happened to you? No one comes to a cemetery this early… Except those who’ve lost everything… Like me, for instance… I buried my only daughter forty days ago… — He paused, his eyes glistening with tears. Snapping back to reality, he looked at the stranger again and repeated:
— So, what’s wrong, dear? You need medical help… You’re pale as a ghost…
Mary didn’t know how to respond… Explaining everything would take hours… And she was so weak… She desperately wanted water… and sleep…
The old man realized the girl was in shock… Pressing her for answers now was pointless… So, taking her hand, he led her to his home.
Mary had no strength to resist… She likely had a high fever… She was shaking… The path from the cemetery to the old man’s cottage wound through the forest. Each step was a struggle, as if weights were tied to her legs… They had to walk about three miles… But the old man confidently guided her along…
Mary’s memories of what followed were hazy… She likely spent days in a feverish delirium. The old man, who had lived near the forest his whole life and knew the healing properties of every herb, carefully prepared restorative teas for her. Though she was neither friend nor family, he cared for her like a daughter.
A month later, Mary regained her strength. But mornings brought strange nausea and dizziness. The thought that she might be pregnant by John made her ill. But there was nothing she could do.
She knew her grandmother’s neighbor’s phone number by heart but couldn’t contact her to check on her grandmother… There was no signal in the forest. The only phone in the village was at the medical clinic. But going there in broad daylight risked betraying the old man who had been so kind…
To get fresh air, Mary often went to the garden. The old man had a little dog named Buddy. To his surprise, the dog quickly bonded with the newcomer. Watching the usually cautious puppy follow Mary like a shadow, the old man remarked… Animals sense a person’s soul… A dog won’t warm to someone with a cruel heart… So, saving Mary was not in vain…
But their peaceful life didn’t last long… A neighbor noticed the once-frugal old man buying more groceries. In truth, he sometimes spoiled Mary, getting her a chocolate bar or ice cream…
Curious neighbors, burning with nosiness, began secretly watching the old man. Days later, their suspicions that something odd was happening at Michael’s cottage were confirmed. One neighbor saw Mary playing with the puppy in the yard.
At first, the vigilant woman crossed herself in fear, mistaking the stranger for the old man’s recently buried daughter. But, looking closer, she realized it wasn’t her.
Within an hour, the district police were ready to storm the house. Mary’s wanted posters had long troubled many officials. The fugitive had vanished without a trace. And now—a breakthrough…
That day, Mary felt particularly unwell… Morning sickness left her gasping for air. So, taking Buddy, she went to the garden. Hidden by trees and bushes, she didn’t see what was happening outside. But the sounds left no doubt…
Cars pulled up to the cottage, one after another… Someone spoke on a radio… Rifles clinked…
— They found me… — Mary whispered…
She wasn’t afraid for herself or her health… But she dreaded how the old man would react… He’d grown so attached to her… Her arrival had given him purpose again… As if his beloved daughter had returned… Mary had overheard him nearly call her by his daughter’s name, only to catch himself…
On trembling legs, Mary entered the house and went straight to the kitchen… The old man was cooking his “signature” dumpling soup… Barely holding back tears, Mary approached her savior and said:
— Michael… Forgive me for everything… They’ve come for me… You’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever known… I’ll never forget your kindness…
The old man turned, startled, and sighed. Of course, he’d suspected this day might come… But he’d hoped…
Mary hugged Michael tightly, kissed both his cheeks, and, raising her hands, slowly walked out of the house.
The old man could no longer hold back his emotions. Wailing loudly and sniffling, he followed Mary… Ready to protect her if needed…
The dog, sensing strangers, darted around the yard, barking… He tried to shield his mistress. His loyal heart sensed danger… But he couldn’t stay still… Suddenly, he saw a stranger by the old rowan tree, holding a gun aimed at Mary… The dog first ran to Mary, as if saying goodbye, then bolted toward the tree… A deafening shot shattered the silence… Buddy yelped pitifully and fell…
Seeing Buddy, Mary felt faint… Her heart burned with unbearable pain… Now, the old man would be utterly alone… Without her, and without his four-legged friend, whom his daughter had once brought home.
Cold metal handcuffs snapped onto Mary’s wrists. They didn’t go easy on her. Sitting in the police van, amid the triumphant cheers of the officers who’d finally caught the fugitive, Mary looked out the window.
The old man knelt before the fallen dog… and watched the departing van with sorrow.
The neighbor who’d reported the strange girl living at Michael’s stood aside… In her heart, she prided herself on being such a vigilant citizen…
Watching the scene, she muttered:
— The old man’s lost his mind! Sheltering a convict in his home! How is that even possible?! Disgraceful! If his late wife knew what he’d been up to in his old age! She’d be turning in her grave!
What a neighbor! Never would’ve expected… He didn’t think of himself, fine, but he could’ve thought of others… What if that convict was deranged and attacked someone?! There are children around… Now it’s dangerous to bring grandkids to the village!
What terrifying times we live in…
Mary faced what followed with detachment. She felt nothing could be worse than what had already happened. During her medical exam, a gruff nurse, moving a sensor over Mary’s stomach, gasped:
— Well, look at that! Our fugitive didn’t waste time! Said she escaped to say goodbye to her dear grandmother! Did you get pregnant by the old man? Weren’t you disgusted lying with him? The girls these days! They’ll do anything for early release!
Well, congratulations! Shall we inform the father? Telegram or carrier pigeon?
Mary tried her hardest to endure. She knew the nurse’s words were meant to provoke her. A perverse amusement. And they revealed more about the nurse than about Mary… Perhaps this woman was bitter at the world, unhappy in her marriage? Or unable to have children?
That didn’t excuse her. But Mary, wise beyond her years, no longer wanted to meet cruelty with cruelty… That didn’t mean she’d given up or broken… On the contrary, she was protecting herself…
John suffered a brain hemorrhage from the blow in the forest. But the case was hushed up… They understood what had happened… The man was half-undressed. The ground showed signs of a struggle… Including Mary’s blood and torn clothing.
He was sent to a psychiatric facility. He suffered frequent panic attacks and memory lapses… He never married. His elderly parents couldn’t care for him.
Days after returning to the colony, Mary received a letter from her grandmother’s neighbor, Aunt Victoria. She offered condolences for her grandmother’s passing. The woman wrote that in her final days, her grandmother was delirious, often calling for Mary… But she passed in her sleep one night.
Mary’s uncle promptly moved from the dormitory to the apartment. The once-quiet home became a den for the neighborhood’s riffraff… The neighbor tried to reason with him, but he ignored her.
Mary, who initially wanted to reply immediately, couldn’t… She decided to let it be… There was nothing she could change…
In due time, Mary gave birth to a healthy boy. She named him Michael, after the old man who’d once saved her. And whom she’d caused so much trouble…
Though the pregnancy was neither wanted nor joyful, after the birth, Mary felt happiness for the first time in ages… She was needed by her child, like air… The baby wasn’t to blame for what had happened…
She’d endured so much… Teetered on the edge of life and death… Yet her child was born… Perhaps he was sent to her for a reason…
One day, Mary was called to the colony’s administration. On the table lay a document for her early release. Without a word, she signed. But she felt no joy. Like a bird long confined to a cramped cage, she hesitated to spread her weary wings… Distrusting herself!
The day of her release arrived. Her barracks mates, grown fond of her, said tearful goodbyes. The girls at the sewing workshop secretly made several sets of onesies and rompers for little Michael.
Mary and Michael had nowhere to go… After some thought, she decided to visit the old man… But approaching the familiar house, she sensed something was terribly wrong…
Weeds overran the once-tidy yard… The windows were dirty… Lifeless… On instinct, Mary reached under the porch. Her fingers found a rusty tin can. Inside, at the bottom, was the house key.
For several minutes, Mary, holding her baby, hesitated to enter this painfully familiar place… Finally, she stepped inside. Everything was exactly as it had been on that fateful day.
On a small table by the window lay an envelope…
Opening it with trembling hands, Mary saw a letter addressed to her:
“Dear Mary,
If you’re reading this, I’ve gone to where I belong. To my girls—my wife and daughter.
You’re always welcome to visit me. I hope you remember where we first met.
I’m certain you’ll return here when the time comes.
I won’t ramble… But the time you spent with me… it was bright and joyful… I’m so glad fate brought us together… Even under such difficult circumstances…
You truly became like a daughter to me. You revived me. Gave me hope…
Sadly, I’m very old… My ailments won’t let me see you as a woman cleared before the law…
I’m hugging you in my mind… Like back then…
This house is now yours by law. All the documents are in the cabinet.
And a request… If you get a dog, name it Buddy.
I buried him under the old apple tree in the garden…
Be happy, my girl!”
Tears streamed from Mary’s eyes… Falling onto little Michael, who looked at his mother in wonder, touching her eyes with tiny fingers…
— We’ll be happy, Grandpa… Thank you for everything… — Mary whispered…
She had much to do. But first, she went to visit Michael… She remembered the way well…
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