She’s crying. Both yesterday and today. She does not leave the house anywhere and is looking for an answer to the question, why did it happen that she said or did wrong? She just loves. And the husband filed for divorce. How do I tell my parents about this? How do I tell my daughter? She lived in the hope that everything would get better.
Forgave, closed my eyes. Now she lay curled up, so small, defenseless, abandoned by everyone. Tears were trembling on her eyelashes. Bitterly salty as her miserable life. So I fell asleep.
And it all started so sunny and beautiful! She grew up a beloved child. The sun did not give her as much warmth as her family. Marusenka was called. She studied well, and was cheerful, and beautiful. She dreamed of becoming a teacher, and her dream came true. She was afraid of one thing, so that her parents would not find out about her love.
Hiding a loved one from everyone. I knew that they would not approve of the choice, they would not give their beloved daughter for the one chosen by the heart. And it didn’t ask.
Already in her last year, she whispered to her mother in a low voice: “Mommy, I’m probably getting married soon.”
But when Sasha crossed the threshold of his parents’ house, his mother even turned pale. The girl saw how mommy was struggling to control herself. And then there were tears, quarrels. But Masha stood her ground. Love filled every cell of her body, all her thoughts. She lived Sasha, breathed him. It was some kind of unearthly love. The girl did not see and did not hear everything that her mother and father saw in her chosen one. And unseemly deeds, and his vulgar jokes. The girl felt like the happiest bride and even shone with that strange radiance that all happy and lovers radiate.
We took the wedding off. Masha went to school and came home on weekends. When she received her diploma, she already had a baby Nastenka. The young woman was so busy with her motherhood that she did not notice at all how her Sasha was changing.
There was no work. Nastenka grew up, she could already be left with her grandmother. “Maybe we’ll go to work, buy a house for ourselves,” she once told her husband. But Sashka didn’t even want to hear about it. Therefore, Masha decided to go alone. She cried in a foreign land, missed her daughter, worked like a convict, and meanwhile Sasha lived a free life.
Three years later, the woman returned, because she no longer had the strength to endure separation from her family. Especially since her mother was constantly calling her home.
She earned a little, her parents helped a little, bought an apartment in the city, celebrated a housewarming party. Nastenka became a schoolgirl. But Maria did not recognize her Sashka. But she continued to turn a blind eye to his friends, to night adventures, drinking. “And maybe he was like that? Only I, blinded by love, did not notice anything,” sometimes caught myself thinking, but continued to endure in silence. Sasha called her names, was jealous, accused her of cheating.
Masha cried, made excuses, swore that she had no one but him. Uselessly. My husband increasingly did not spend the night at home. Maria didn’t believe the gossip until she accidentally saw her lover in the arms of some blonde. And she believed him so much, endured everything, forgave everything, was afraid of losing. I couldn’t imagine my life without him. This is her daughter’s own dad, who loves him so much. Probably, such a deep, blind love for Sasha was transmitted to the child from Maria.
“Mommy, if Daddy comes late and drunk, we will sit quietly and be silent, just so that he does not leave us,” Nastenka asked her mother more than once. And Mom endured. And she was silent. And even smiled at her husband. And he abused her patience, neglected her obsessive love.
Maria dreamed of her mother, a river, meadows, a daughter who hugged her neck with small hands. The phone call interrupted the dream. She didn’t answer. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. She looked at her watch, she would still catch the bus to the village.
“God, what a beautiful world!” she thought, looking through the window glass at the street. – I see, I hear, I walk. My daughter needs me, my parents need me. He doesn’t need me, but I need him. And I will live with that. I will only love him. He is in my daughter, for whom I am grateful to God and to him. We must live. God will give me strength.” The woman sighed, smiled and began to get ready for the road. To the dearest people who are always waiting for her. And there was a glimmer of hope in her heart that her great and strong love would still win.
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