Pain

Larisa was spinning at the mirror, looking at herself from all sides, the dress is just wonderful.

– Sveta, you’ve been kind of sad all evening, – Larisa looks at a friend who came with her to try on a dress, – has something happened?

– Yes, nothing happened, let’s measure it… the bride – Sveta could be rude, Larisa knew that, but now something clearly happened, the friend was upset about something.

Larisa cast an anxious glance at the girl, she jerked her shoulder and buried her face in the phone, fingers quickly ran, flashed across the phone screen.

She writes to someone, Larisa thought, maybe she’s fighting with a guy, although Sveta said that there is a lull on the personal front.

Larisa twirled around, the dressmaker, picked up the threads where she needed to sew, Sveta changed her clothes, and they went outside.

– There is nowhere to put money, I would go to the market to buy a dress, not worse, but even better.

This one’s going to take the money.

“You didn’t like the dress?” Larisa asks, distressed.

– What’s it to me? I’m just saying, wait, – Sveta pulled out her phone, dropped the call, but they kept calling her.

– Answer Sveta, I can step aside, – Larisa said conciliatingly.

– Aside? – Sveta looked at Larisa strangely, – yes, you should finally step aside…

Larisa felt a little offended that her friend was talking to her like that. She walked away, heard a piece of conversation.

– I’ve told you everything, then it’s your turn…

It’s like she’s fighting with a guy, Larisa realized, so she’s nervous.

Sveta left for Moscow, a year ago she came to her hometown, it seems like a visit, but she stayed, got a job, lives, works.

Larisa was walking a little behind, Svetlana was swearing with someone on the phone, they reached the fork, Svetlana to the left, Larisa straight.

The friend waved goodbye and left.

Larisa went forward a little discouraged.

Sveta is always a little ahead, punchy, assertive, Larisa is more calm, complaisant.

The negative attracts, because they are together, that’s what they always said about them.

Sveta started dating guys early, bright appearance, eyes with a haze, long thick hair, figure took shape early.

Larisa, on the other hand, was a modest person, she did not meet with guys, they somehow did not pay attention to her.

Sveta left after school to enroll in Moscow, graduated there, got a job, got married.

Larisa studied in her hometown, lived at home, did not meet anyone.

She met Pasha by chance, came to practice, he was her boss. Larisa had never seen such wonderful blue eyes, such a snow-white smile and a gentle rolling voice before.

A friend came at a time when Larisa and Pasha’s relationship moved into a new phase of development, the guys decided to live together.

– And you’re a mouse, I hate you, – said a friend on the phone laughing – how did you grab such a handsome guy, that’s a quiet one for you. Tell me, what’s wrong with him? Is he oblique? Low intelligence? is he joking badly?

– No, – laughs Sveta, – everything is fine.

– Aah, I get it, he’s zero in bed, right?

– It’s fine, I’m telling you.

– UUUUU, well, where, where was I when this deity passed by! Tell? Why was I unlucky, why didn’t I tear off such a handsome smart guy and…

– Yes, Light…

– I’m kidding, you know. And the truth is, I’m happy for you, girlfriend. So, when is the wedding? When will little feet stomp on the roads of this city? I’m too much of a godmother…

Sveta did not go to Moscow anymore, reluctantly admitted that she divorced her husband and came home to lick her wounds.

Larisa and Pasha were doing well, gradually came to the idea of a wedding.

In the wedding troubles, Larisa somehow forgot her friend, and also…she is terribly uncomfortable, but Pasha asked a strange question, and Larisa came to the conclusion that the groom is against their friendship.

– Lorca, do you have to be friends with Svetlana?

– We have been friends since childhood…

– Then you can do it not at our house, okay kid? No offense, OK?

– OK, – Larisa said then, confused.

There were questions about the dress at home, mom asked why Sveta didn’t come in, they decided that Larisa would stay with her parents for a week before the wedding.

– She was in a hurry, Mom.

Larisa has a happy day.

In the morning, a joyful and a little confused Pasha called to say how much he loves, and how glad he is that she agreed to become his wife.

The wedding went great, Larisa never caught Svetlana’s thoughtful gaze on herself, when a friend saw Larisa looking at her, she smiled and winked.

And a month after the wedding, this happened.

Photos of naked Svetlana and ….Pavel, her Larisa’s husband, were showered on her phone.

Larisa in shock rushed to call her friend, what a wild photoshop, but her phone was disconnected.

Lost or stolen, photoshopped the devil knows what, these are scoundrels.

Pasha.

How to tell her husband about it.

I was just about to call my husband when he came by himself. Larissa could tell by his face that he already knew.

– Pash, I know everything, it’s punishable. we’ll find these scoundrels, you know what kind of guys we have at work, they’ll find these scoundrels in no time, poor Svetka.

Larisa hugged her husband, who was sitting on a chair, and he took her hands away.

– What are you talking about?

— Here’s about these photos…About this creepy Photoshop.

Pasha glanced at the phone screen.

— It’s not Photoshop…

– what? – Larisa did not understand, – how is it?

– Just like that, you stupid cow…

– Pash, what are you doing?

– It’s okay, I’m leaving you…

– How? Where to? Pash, what are you doing? Are you upset about these stupid photos?

– Mmmmm, wake up. I’m leaving you, you hear, I don’t love you.

– How? We are…

– How’s that? Like that.

I’m a fool and a coward, I almost missed my beloved woman, I love Svetlana, I struggled with this feeling for a long time, well, I couldn’t stand it…

She is expecting a baby from me, today she sent the ultrasound results, there will be a son, you know…That’s it, I have to go…Don’t write to me, please don’t humiliate yourself and don’t make the Light nervous…

Tick-tock, tick-tock, the clock is pounding with huge hammers in complete silence… the world is frozen, there is only a clock, tick-tock, tick-tock.

Painfully.

How to breathe… inhaled the air and keep it inside, the lungs are burning, bursting them, but how to breathe?

The world froze silence quietly and for a long time a drop of water drips from the tap – kaaaaaap, kaaaaap, beats against the sink, kaaaapppp.

Silence the whole world froze, the world died…

But here you turn your head and….an avalanche of noise has fallen on your head, the tram is ringing, the car is honking, the TV is screaming, they are buzzing, they are blowing, and you are screaming aaaaaaa, aaaaaaa.

Booolnoooo.

You’re howling, falling to your knees, you can’t breathe, you can’t breathe again.

Aaaaaaaaa…Aaaaaaa…

– Daughter, daughter, but what is it?

– Aaaaaaaaaaaaa, – the scream breaks out, you can finally breathe, and also scream to drown out the pain, there, somewhere in the heart…

– My daughter, I would like to eat.

Silence.

– The daughter is eating the mother is going crazy.

Silence, there’s no you, there’s no you, noooo, you’re nobody, don’t touch, it hurts.

Does it hurt? And why does it hurt? How can it hurt anyone? The one who is nobody?

Soooo.

Who am I?

Nobody…

Why, I’m human.

– Larisa, where are you going, daughter?

– Mom, I’m going to the store, I want yogurt.

– Daughter, yes, there in the refrigerator.

– Mom, I have to go outside. Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon.

– Hello.

– Hello. Coloring?

– Haircut.

– Which one?

– The most audacious.

– Oooh, my client.

– Well, how do you like it?

– yes. That’s what we need. Thanks.

– Daughter…Your hair.

– Mom, I’m fine. This is a fashionable haircut. Let’s go shopping tomorrow, I’ve lost weight, look.

– Yes, even today, Larisa.

– Tomorrow. I’ll sleep.

– Oh, Tanya, hello, she cut her hair, almost bald, painted black, long bangs, red. Skinny, lost weight in a week.

Well, at least she started talking, oh, I don’t know…

A year has passed.

– Mom, and how to file for divorce.

– What do you mean?

– Well, how can I divorce my ex-husband?

– Aren’t you divorced? Until now? He seems to have a child…

– Ma, I don’t care what he has…

– Hello, Larisa.

– Hi, Pash.

– Why did you decide to file for divorce?

– Why do I need someone else’s surname, let her beloved woman wear it.

“Well, you’re right. And you’ve changed, just a vamp woman. Why such a change.

– For what purpose are you interested?

– Just like that…

Another year has passed. And another year. And another year.

– Laris, marry me.

– No, – he says with fear, – no, we’re fine as it is.

“I’ll kill him.”

– Who, – Larisa asks, turning over on her stomach and looking at the man who sat up in bed.

– The one who hurt you, that the word wedding throws you up to the ceiling.

Larisa looks attentively, shakes her head.

– What nonsense. I just don’t want to.

She lies awake at night, watching a man sniffling on a pillow, her man, her l….ly… love…lu-bi-my,” he says to himself in syllables.

She will never admit to anyone that she loves again and that she is afraid.

Afraid that it will hurt SO much again.

Then she didn’t know HOW much it hurt, now she knows, it makes it even scarier. She then patched up a hole in her heart, sewed on a living one, tore out love by the roots, the wound remained, and she sewed it up, with harsh threads.

Boooolno…

The wound bled for a long time, I forbade myself to think, it is impossible, let them be happy.

You can’t slack off.

Or maybe it’s not like then? After all, you can’t live like this if you don’t believe? What to do? What should I do? For three years, a man has been around…

He came to her place of work.

Gray…Where’s the gloss? Where are the blue eyes, the charming smile?

– Larisa, hello.

– Hello, Pasha. Something happened?

– There is no one else but you…Sorry.

– I don’t understand.

– You’ve become like that. Why weren’t you like this before, I wouldn’t trade you for Svetka.

– Pasha, let’s get to the point.

– She’s cheating on me…I can’t, I left so as not to mess things up. You know how it hurts….

– I know, – Larisa looks straight at me, – I know when the life comes out of you a little bit…kaaap, kaaap, kaaap.

A minute ago you were the happiest person on earth, and then a knife was thrust into your heart, you can’t breathe, and the person calmly leaves…

So I know, Pasha.

Okay, let’s go.

– Where to?

– To the bar.

-You will drink and complain about your wife, she deliberately did not say the name of her ex-girlfriend, I will support you morally.

— let’s go.

Three hours later, Svetlana called a taxi and sat her ex-husband drunk in the trash, sent him home.

Lying in bed, Larisa called Tom, her beloved.

– Hello…

– hi.

– hi.

– You still want to get married…on me.

– yes.

– Well, get married.

– I’ll be right there.

– Why?

– Well, at least I’ll give you flowers.

– No need, come back tomorrow with your things.

– Well, no, you will move with your things.

– Okay. Man, right?

– Yeah. Where have you been?

– Saw.

– With whom?

– With him.

– And how is he?

– Who?

– Well, who were you drinking with.

– Oh, yes, figs knows him, he says it hurts.

– That’s it.

– Well, yes. Okay, I’m going to sleep. I’ll be there tomorrow.

– Come on.

— This… You know what?

– what?

– Oh, no, though. I’ll tell you tomorrow, or you’ll say you’re drunk.

– What do you say?

– That I love you.

– Won’t you forget?

– Nooo, I’m for real, and they don’t forget that.

– What kind of you I have…

– Which one?

– Drunk and so mine.

– Yours, of course, who else needs such a fool. I’m going to sleep, okay?

He was standing near the office, his former confidence returned, he would still show this Svetka, she would still cry, come running, she would be on her knees, he had a huge bouquet of flowers in his hands.

She came out, smiling. Ha…Who would doubt, otherwise look at her. all so cheeky. Well, well…

Takes a step forward.

– Larisa… me…

She runs somewhere and jumps on a man’s neck.

– Wow, what are you today.

– I will always be like this now.

They pass by, happy.

How happy they are, they have something to breathe.

And it hurts him…