I am a young, beautiful and slightly flighty girl of 24 years old, I work as a novice lawyer in a construction organization. Ironically, my roommate in the office was an aunt of retirement age, a Soviet formation, a tedious but wayward spinster.
Periodically, we have a “War for territory”, we do not agree in political views, and in general, what can I, a young modern girl, talk about with a Soviet relic? But one day I was in a calm, peaceful mood, conducive to sincere conversations, and my colleague told me the story of her broken heart.
“I was a little older then than you are now, about 27 years old, I fell in love with one guy, well, how much fear. He was handsome, then it seemed to me, independent and responsible. And it all started so wonderfully with us… And then he began to disappear often, he devoted less time to me, he was cold, his soul just froze!
I was terribly worried. I was a fool-I ran after him, and he just left me! I don’t know how I survived then…
I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep, I went to work on autopilot, I cried my eyes out, I didn’t want to live without him.
Naturally, everyone in the team noticed that something was wrong with me. Once the director called me to his office and said: “Go on a business trip to Moscow, my dear, you will work at the exhibition for two weeks, a sensible person is needed there.” I refused, but the director forced me to go by his strong-willed decision. What should I do?
I have no strength, my eyes are wet, but work is work. I went, however, without much enthusiasm… While I was cowering on the train, such pleasant moments, meetings and days spent with my former lover surfaced in my head. You won’t believe it, I wanted to commit suicide! I drew pictures in my head of how he would cry when he found out what had happened to me, realized that he loved me, that he was wrong, but nothing could be changed, and he would suffer. The pain just tore my chest, I couldn’t find a place for myself, I wanted to run wherever I looked. I didn’t even notice how I ended up at the railway station in Moscow. I was walking towards the taxi stand, and people were running past, someone was in a hurry to catch a train, someone to their loved ones, but they were all busy with themselves, no one paid attention to me. I felt a wild loneliness somewhere inside.
We must pay tribute, as promised by the director, the conditions in the hotel were gorgeous. I was putting things in the room when there was a knock on the door. I opened it, and there was a man standing on the threshold, blue eyes, broad shoulders, tall – just a picture. And his charming smile… the earth has gone from under my feet! Our romance began at first sight, walks, restaurants, dancing until morning, mind-blowing sex, beautiful words – the whole carousel so turned me around that I forgot to think that I had suffered once. It was a very beautiful novel! This man gave me as much warmth, tenderness and care as no one has ever given me! Before leaving, he said, holding my hand tremblingly in his, these words: “My dear girl, you deserve the best! Learn to appreciate and love yourself! Don’t you dare cry anymore and don’t let anyone hurt you!” These words are forever imprinted in my heart… Since then, I have carried them with me as I once made a promise and did not dare to break it. I knew we wouldn’t see each other again, but I realized that he was given to me from above to heal my crippled soul, heal my bleeding wounds and help me get back on my feet to find the meaning of life.
He wrote me such touching letters later, but I stopped responding to them… I wanted it to remain a beautiful story, an uncorrupted routine.
I still keep the letters… And the ex? Yes, of course, when I was “cured” of him, he came running and tried to bring me back, but I just looked at him with a condescending smile. Where does he care about my “business trip novel”…”
I looked at my colleague with completely different eyes. She turned out to be a vulnerable woman, but strong in spirit.
I realized that everything in life is given to us for a reason: something for a lesson and experience, something for edification, and something for salvation…